The 3 weeks and Tisha B'Av

Let me first start out by saying that I am not a superstitious person in general. This does not preclude ideas of intentional coincidence or accidents or even parallelism. Also, my knowledge and general practice of these times is currently very elementary.
The basics of these days can be found and understood from a historical point of view rather nicely on wikipedia (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tisha_B%27av and http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_three_weeks). Even here events other than the temple destruction are listed as happening on this same day. I will get to that in a moment.
The three weeks are supposed to be the time between the breach of the walls to the destruction. Each haftorot potion successively gets a little more grim, and the mourning increases in a near exponential fashion. We go from a minor (sunrise to nightfall) fast to a major one (sunset to nightfall). And the restrictions (or at least minhag restrictions) increase. Weddings, haircuts not being permissible in the three weeks; then music, then meat in the nine days; then sitting akin to shiva in the meal preceding the fast. Whew, this is heavy stuff. Just listing some things is gateway to mourning.
In years past I had a hard time connecting with this period, esp from a temple destruction p-o-v. And as stated, not being the superstitious type, the elevating of mourning hadn't made sense either.
Well, I have not had a great week to put it mildly. And those around me have had very crappy weeks too. In my small circle, my limited realm, I have seen destruction on all fronts. Car (and the ensuing financial) trouble, job loss, home caught on fire (because of exploding water heater) and all those ramifications, hospice status, start of chemotherapy, two different sets of hearts being broken (and all the lives that effects). It's been a bad week. Every time the phone rang, I almost dreaded it today. This was supposed to be my shabbat: day of rest, day of peace. Certainly there were some of those elements, but the overall tone was grief.
Is this what it means to increase sorrow? Is this just the beginning as there are still two weeks to go before Tisha B'Av?
If I attempt to put myself in the context of say a thousand years ago when already a millenia had past since the destruction of the temple and dispersion of the Jews, I get a glimmer of the fear. The first crusades were thought to begin this day too (though it's probably more likely that they started a few months later) (for an in-depth view leading to the start, which also indicated November see: http://www.deremilitari.org/RESOURCES/ARTICLES/magdalino.htm).
The Spanish expulsion comes a little closer (1492) and the English expulsion (1290) may have occurred on this day (http://www.britainexpress.com/History/medieval/expulson-jews.htm). It's easy to add to an existing pity party.
On the one hand, knowing that this is a bad time of year, is it easier to accept misfortune? (That could be a tremendous euphemism). Then again, on the other, doesn't adding to previous tragedy dilute to some extent both?
Tying this in to my contemporary setting and most recent events, I tend to think the latter is more the case. My friend who had a very serious apartment fire is not so concerned with my other friend's broken heart. The person who lost a job frets little over someone else's car repair bill.
I want to think this is the same on the much larger scale of mourning the destruction of the temple. The day is set for that. Tisha B'Av is a day to commemorate the loss the second temple, the day the Jews lost their holy land, the day Judaism would never be the same. I want to honor that. I want to focus only on that while still recognizing that other bad things happen on the same day. [Statistically speaking, there are only 383--ok that's a discussion for the Jewish calendar, but it's just used as an example here--days, and there have been 5768 years; clearly there will be overlap of tragedy].
I want to say that Tisha B'Av is special enough, significant enough, to stand on its own. I do not need multiple calamities to feel the depth of the day. One horror is sufficient. And I am sure those who suffer their own personal woes might would agree.